Insistence or Flexibility?Your Approach to Detail, Structure, Routine and Follow Through.

In my coaching practice the Birkman Executive Assessment tool is invaluable for uncovering behaviours, needs and stress points. When needs go unmet they become stress points that result in unproductive behaviours that sabotage success. It is an invaluable tool that uncovers hidden minefields and emotional triggers. It is a strategy piece that helps to shift mindsets.

Insisting on the course of process, and that outcomes follow a prescribed pattern, is not always the best course of action. When the outcome is not what was planned or desired, fear sets in and sometimes we quit or we dig in our heels and become domineering, overbearing and difficult.

Process is linear whereas life is often anything but linear. Have you noticed how there are no straight lines in Nature? There are no straight lines in the topography of the landscape or in the design of land mass? This insistence on process, or a defined way of doing anything - whether executing a task or the pathway to a profession - is made up of ad hoc observations and preferences for how things should be done to get to the desired outcome.

Insisting on doing anything in a manner that has “proven" to be successful is often a slippery slope usually dictated by the fear of losing control. Is this discipline or rigidity? This is food for thought.

How many weight loss or nutrition protocols have we embarked on only to quit because a certain amount of weight was not lost or our skin did not show the hoped-for improvement or any other improvement that might have been the reason we saw the practitioner? We give up when another approach may be required.

Keeping a food dairy might show the extras and the emotional triggers attached to the trips to the fridge and/or pantry. Perhaps we need to shift the focus away from weight goals towards life goals. One life goal could be the desire to maintain strength and mobility so we can care for ourselves as we age and keep as many options open as possible for the enjoyment of our lives. We might want to lift weights so we maintain bone mass and can reach up to the top shelf at 80 years of the wisdom of life’s experiences without fracturing a bone or falling and fracturing a femur. One senior I knew broke her spinal vertebrae simply flipping a sheet while making her bed. This contributed to unbearable pain for the rest of her life.

What is the barrier to exploring flexibility as the preferred option? Is it the fear of the unknown? The situation can always be reassessed as new information becomes available. The more flexible our mindset, we relax and make room for new and different possibilities.

Flexibility makes it easier to access creativity.